The idea of managing our time in college is something that is abstract can’t be seen, heard, or touched, it is a feeling that only a person face with themselves. I have come to believe one fact: that managing your time in college is one of the most important things to be on top of, whether you find school to be the least exciting thing or not. Believing in yourself and following what you feel is right; I believe it is extremely stressful to go to college without having your time managed correctly. It is important to manage your time well because of many reasons. Many months throughout high school I have went back and forth. I was confused, not knowing which team I wanted to play on, In other words not knowing if I had wanted to spend my life being with a man or a woman. In the book there is a short story called Living With Integrity, by Bob Barret and he states that “integrity, it’s a belief that’s tested in those gut-wrenching moments when conflicting values pull me in opposite directions” (pg.43). Although I do agree with bob that integrity is tested in those moments but also many things come along with being pulled in each direction, like judgment from others, what to choose and why, fear of the unknown , and what to expect after the decision is made is what keeps us pulling back and forth with ourselves and these values. Knowing yourself and what you want will bring you closer to a decision. The four dreadful years of high school I had spent with a girlfriend on and off repetitively. Being so young I had always had a feeling to explore my options, to become filmier with the unknown, but someone had been keeping me from that. I had spent high school with a relationship that I had never felt deep down that was enough. Years spent wanting to explore my sexuality, and so that is what I secretly sought out to do. Unfortunately, I have spent all those years feeling lost and ashamed because I didn’t know myself, I didn’t know what I wanted in life and I had never felt so alone. As if I had spent month’s running in circles in a small all white room, feeling like I had no identity. Running from this feeling, and continuing to live a heterosexual life something else began to emerge over the months, still young at the time and in a relationship with a girl that was beautiful, her name was Vivian. She was friendly, had long hair, and glowing skin, she seemed like someone who would be perfect for me. But deep down I had a sense of unhappiness of knowing that to her and others our love for each other was unconditional, but on my end it was another type of feeling, one that never felt right. In high school you usually make all kinds of friends throughout the years of attending. I had become friends with other gay and lesbian students. I never knew why, we had just instantly connected. It was the start of tenth grade when I began hanging out with that crowd, I started to realize and learn more things about myself than I ever thought possible. Things became clear to me by the end of the semester; I was much closer to knowing who and what I wanted for myself. Time goes by so quickly, summer break was right around the corner. People at school had begun to become a little suspicious of my actions. People I call friends making fun of me and asking every question possible, I felt ashamed and harassed by it, as I became more comfortable with my gay side and more awkward with my straight side. I felt frightened not realizing the changes I had with myself, i felt cornered and suspected with questions by everyone I had felt