DRAFT AND REVISION. PWYL p. 90
1 My thesis in this essay stated that I believe that having to change schools does not harm children for three reasons. Children at new schools learn how to make new friends. They learn how to get along with a variety of people. They also learn about different teaching styles. For these three reasons, I believe that having to change schools does not harm children. Boring, mechanical ending.
-The conclusion restates the thesis.
-Instead of recopying your thesis and essay map, try, finding an original, empathic way to conclude your essay.
2 “A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step” (Lao Tzu). As I discussed in this causal analysis essay, I would have never started painting again if I hadn’t gone back to school. I’m the first to admit that it was a long, hard road to get my degree, and sometimes I really questioned the value of certain courses I had to take (like algebra, for example, which I think is a totally useless course for artists. The entire math requirement needs revision, in my opinion). But going back to school was the right choice for me, who knows, maybe it would be for others. Don’t introduce new point or irrelevant material.
-Treat the major point of your essay in separate body paragraph rather than in your exit.
-Stay focus on your essays specific thesis and purpose.
-Don’t allow any unimportant or off-subject comments to drift into your concluding remarks. Don’t track on a conclusion.
-There
