Gilberts (1992) states that “Partners in an ideal relationship lose no self into the relationship because their self boundaries are intact and their inner guidance systems are well developed…They function as autonomous, individual selves in or out of the relationship” (pg. 100). She goes on to explain that neither partners relay on the other for support. This happens when both of the partners have high levels of differentiation. It is because of those high levels that it is possible for the partners to retain a separateness not seen in other relationships (Giberts, 1992, pg. 100). Gilberts (1992) goes on to argue that “If two individuals are emotionally separate, any anxiety one may experience does not escalate into painful interchanges nor settle into emotional patterns” (pg. 101). The characteristic of separateness is key to an ideal relationship and is a vital contribution to the pleasure and excitement of new