“You will have to get blood work done and take a pregnancy test once a month because if you get pregnant on this medicine your baby will have birth defects” said my doctor.
I just couldn’t believe it… how could this acne medicine cause birth defects for my baby. It scared me but I knew I had to get rid of my acne in order to make me happy with my appearance. Little did I know there were major consequences of that choice I made coming quickly. For the first month that I was on it my acne seemed to be improving greatly and nothing about my life had changed. I went along and got my blood work checked and everything was perfect. I was ecstatic with my choice to take this medicine and I already could see my future with no acne and I could see how much happier I would be. Summer was coming to an end and so I was preparing for my upcoming fall golf season. I would practice every day in order to maintain my number one spot and my title as captain. Everything was going great until it reached three weeks into my golf season and it was time for our first league tournament. I started out only 3 over par through 8 holes and I was on fire until we reached hole nine. I hit an awful tee shot which I would have usually been able to recover from but it seemed to be just bad shot after bad shot. I ended up taking a triple bogey on a hole I would usually par.
“Just forget about that hole like you usually do and par the next 5 holes for me” said my coach.
He was right I was the master at recovering from bad holes so I shouldn’t let that one hole discourage me. Well unfortunately I let the next 9 bad holes get the best of me and I shot a 97 which is a score I hadn’t shot since I was a freshman. I want astonished that I just did that and let my whole entire team down when I am supposed to be the once setting a good example for them. I was depressed for days because of that league tournament and I just couldn’t seem to get over it. This is when I started to notice a change in my behavior. I started to get the worst anxiety that I have ever experienced and it was starting to take a toll on my health. I was just flat out exhausted. I would sleep for 10 to 12 hours every night and then have to take a 2 to 3 hour nap every day when I got home from school. This was odd behavior for me because I would have never been able to take naps before but now I had to. It was awful because I started to stray away from my friends in order to sleep and I wouldn’t even talk to my sister who was my best friend. Every time I went to lay down I would get an excruciating pain in my lower back every time I went to lay down. I felt like my whole life was collapsing as we spoke and I couldn’t do anything about it. The worst day of them all was just about to happen.
“Hailey please clean your room before we have to go to dinner for your sisters birthday” said my mom
“Hailey please answer me… Hailey?” my mom repeated.
Little did she know I was sitting in the corner of my room having the worst panic attack I had ever had. I was balling my eyes out and shaking while screaming about having to go to the hospital because I didn’t