Oh it was just the typical morning for me, Big Sexy. I woke up hungover, again, from some late night drinks at the tavern. But hangovers aren’t what they used to be anymore. Not remembering anything from the night before, I saw a nice looking loaf of bread that I just did not recall getting. I could only assume that Big Buns had come over last night and gave me bread for some fish. Big Buns was hands down the best baker in all of Wichamstow. He could bake anything the human mind can think of. If you think it, he will bake it! Big Buns was that good.
Realizing that Big Buns had left me this nice delicate, it was so light light and fluffy, loaf of bread, I had to find him and thank him. Big Buns lived across the river and through the woods. But before I could go adventuring in my boat I need to visit Big Black for some of the finest, sharpest, deadliest, knives. My technique for fishing is attaching Big Black’s knives to the end of a long stick. I wait for the most perfect opportune time to strike the fish and kill them for dinner and trade.
Big Black’s Shop was just a little while away from my hut on foot. And by a few minutes I mean a quite a while, but for me that is nothing; I walk everywhere. I went into the shop with intentions to pick up my usual. By the time I got to the shop, he was not there. Typical Big Black just not showing up to work. It was not the first time he did this to me either. There was this one time with this Anglo-Saxon prostitute girl at the tavern, and well, you get the point. I could not take it anymore, I had no choice but to go without the knife and head home.
Back at home now, I go to visit my good old pal Big Buns. I untie my gorgeous boat and set sail. Down the river I run into Big Black dancing in the middle of all the currents.
“Aaaah Big Black, how are you doing my good man?”
“ Fine, thanks for asking. What are you doing now?”
“Glad you asked buddy. I can really use a new knife to go fishing. Do you have anything I can use?”
“Why certainly my friend! I carry a vast majority of knives in my blacksmithing shack. What sort of knife do you want a big one or small?”
“Excellent! Preferably a knife that is long, stiff, and able to cut through the strongest of fish!”
“Okay great, I will provide you with my strongest knife.I have one in stock so you don’t have to wait. This process for creating these types of knives take a very long time. Luckily you are my friend and I will not charge you for this, but I warn you this knife gets rusty very quickly in salt water because it is made out of steel!”
“Sounds fabulous! Expect great things Black, I hope you like fish! See you later!”
“See you later”
Big Black is one special guy. I owe him for that knife. But for now I need to continue my path towards Big Bun’s Bakery. Almost reaching the other side of the river I notice water slowly getting into my boat. I do my best job to scoop the water getting in the boat out with my hands. As more and more water keeps rushing in I realize that the bottom of my boat is broken. My damn near gorgeous boat is no longer gorgeous. Big Woody screwed me. His boat is defective! Having to walk the rest of the way, which was not all that long, I finally got to see Big Buns.
“Big Buns, good to see you! I couldn’t thank you enough for that bread you gave to me!”
“It was my pleasure Big Sexy it’s just what I do! I couldn’t be happier with the nice fish that you left for me.”
