You will notice that within certain situations other people's actions are sometimes unchangeable. This is the biggest problem for controlling perfectionists, no matter how hard you try, you can’t change them. Despite your immense effort to change someone’s nature, the outcome will not change and you will only drain yourself in the process. Instead of wasting so much time and energy on trying to change that person, their are different ways you can change the nature of your relationship instead. You can change how they affect you and hopefully create a different outcome than before. One of the first things this chapter mentions is the ability to change your own interpretations. Instead of becoming embarrassed or frustrated when that person criticizes you, you’ll become aware that what they say is no reflection on yourself. You can control what to believe and are capable of changing the way you feel about it. Once you comprehend that what they say has nothing do with you, they will no longer have an effect on you. When dealing with a controlling perfectionists, it's important to know that you can choose and pick your battles. Compromising with a perfectionist takes time and becoming verbally loud and aggressive isn't always the answer. It’s better to assert your control in a firm and resolved manner that shows this problem is theirs to deal with, …show more content…
In spite of all your hard work and effort put into dealing with a controlling perfectionist, you’re still dealing with someone of a personality disorder and there could be some severe deeper damages. The types of therapy used for controlling perfectionist is psychoanalytic, humanistic/existential, and cognitive behavioral. When bringing up therapy to a perfectionist it’s extremely important to approach them with a loving, supportive manner. If they do decide to take up therapy, the authors point out that it’s important to find the right therapist for that person’s specific needs. Professional help can not only be used for the perfectionist but can be used to help yourself as well. Attending therapy could help you decide how to deal with a controlling perfectionist and the strategies you can use to approach them. This helps release some of your stress and frustrated that was brought on by the controlling