After the war Septimus still suffers from hallucinations of the war thinking that he will be attacked any minute. The shock and fear that he experienced will haunt him forever limiting him to be the person he was before. “and this gradual drawing together …show more content…
15) This gives us a better idea on how Septimus feels and how this fear keeps consuming him. These hallucinations not only scare him but cause him to have conversations with himself making him believe that it is his friend that he lost at war. “She must go back to tell him, go back to him sitting there on the green chair under the tree, talking to himself, or to that dead man Evans, whom she had only seen once for a moment in the shop. He had seemed nice and quiet man; a great friend of Septimus’s, and he and been killed in the War.”(pg.66) At this point in time Septimus is in denial and won’t accept he’s dead making it harder on him to move on and have a normal life. When he was younger he was a lover of Shakespeare and poetry. His love for writing was so strong that is what encouraged him to enlist in the wat in the first place. He was so proud of being English that it opened his eyes to see that England was worthy enough to be …show more content…
His depression is so that now his own wife is embarrassed by his behavior and now she’s scared ever since he threatened to commit suicide. “Septimus had said, “I will kill myself”; an awful thing to say. Suppose they had heard him? She looked at the crowd. Help, help! she wanted to cry out to butchers’ boys and women. Help!” This helps to introduce the damage between their relationship and how she’s now unhappy. She really loves him but is unable to help him deal with the horrors he is living. This is also an introduction on how all this sadness and fear later on lead him to want to end his life. He feels numb unable to feel anything. He is basically emotion less and making him wonder if the world still has meaning which only makes him feel worse because it is a reminder that even though his wife cares for him he feels lonely and like no one really cares. “It might be possible, Septimus thought, looking at England from the train window, as they left New haven; it might be possible that the world itself is without meaning”(pg.88) If the main reason he left in the first place doesn’t make him feel anything it just proves how hard it is for him to feel something again. His death wish keeps growing as the sadness progresses. He Knows that there is a part of him that still wants to live and be happy but there is also another part that wants to