Shanel Jarbo
Professor Moorman
ENG 1510: Essay 3
24 October 2014
Balancing Gender Roles Gender roles are linked to us from the day we are in our mother’s womb. We are expected to follow these expectations to satisfy our population. Society and cultures create their own rules on how one should represent themselves, but do no recognized the effect it has on a person. Society often spends too much time setting high expectations for genders to represent. Women are encouraged to express their sadness, guilt, feelings, and shame; men on the other hand are encouraged to express anger and hostility. When a women experiences a break up with her significant other she is taught it is okay to cry and feel the pain she is going through. Men in this scenario are taught the opposite. They are taught to not cry because society voices that men do not cry and to just move on to a new girl. Even today color-coded gender labels are applied, males are to wear blue and females pink. This all starts when a baby is in the womb, suppose a lady is pregnant and her friend will like to surprise her with some gifts for her baby depending on the gender she will match pinks and purples for a girl and blue and green for a boy. Gender roles also play a part when it is time to choose what type of toys a child should play with. Parents will supply the boys with toy trucks, toy soldiers, and superheroes, while girls are given dolls to play with and dress up. Society allows some flexibility for males and females to act out of their gender roles, men are able to achieve some feminine roles and vice versa for women. We now see more male nurses rather than just females and many women are joining the army showing off their aggression. People who identify themselves as gay, lesbian, or bisexual are now more comfortable with revealing themselves because society is becoming more understanding. Aside from society, cultures have their own expectations on how males and females should represent themselves. My culture is Chaldean and they are beyond strict when it comes to gender roles. Men in our culture have the satisfaction of doing what their hearts please, but the women have limits. If a man wants to go out to the club on a Saturday night with his friend and decide to come home at four in the morning that is acceptable, but if a girl does it she will be in serious trouble. Dating in the Chaldean culture is taken very seriously. The men are allowed to be in and out of relationships, the whole family accepts the fact that he is dating and are happy, the girlfriend is allowed to come over whenever she wants, etc. For the ladies it is the opposite, we never mention to our dads we have a boyfriend or that we even have a crush on a guy. If a Chaldean father comes home and notices his daughter has a guy over he will most likely kill both the daughter and guy. Most Chaldean parents rather not have their daughters date because they believe it will give their family a bad name and the girl a bad reputation. Sex before marriage is one of the biggest sins to Chaldean families. If the girl isn’t a virgin many will look down on her and it will be difficult for her to get married in the future, but the men can sleep with as many women as they want and marriage is still possible in their future. In most marriages the wife is a stay at home mom and is in charge of cooking, cleaning, and meeting the needs of her children and husband. The husband is the breadwinner and supplies the financial needs for his family. The Chaldean culture doesn’t believe in divorce, they believe that the couple should stay together for the sake of their children no matter what the problem is. In some cases a divorce will happen, but it makes the women look bad not the man. The gender role expectations of society and cultures have a negative effect on me. If my boyfriend, brother, etc. go through a breakup or any other hurtful scenario I would want them
