Hey, you! Yeah, you. If you are reading this note taped to the door of room 221B, you must be the roommate of the infamous, Alejandro Guerrero. First off let me congratulate you to being accepted to the University of Chicago! You have worked hard to get to this point in life. I am not speaking from a philosophical perspective, I am literally talking about having to climbs all those flights of stairs to get this one door. Imagine waking up late and running to class down those steps half-way sleepy, yikes. Anyway, enough small talk… lets us get down to the purpose of this raggedy note. I must warn you that prior to opening the door before you, there are some omens you must heed!
As we speak your roommate, Alejandro, may be in the middle of binge
