In the next verse, the character confirms that he can barely remember events. However, the character accepts their faulty memories and thinks he hasn’t done anything wrong if he can’t remember it in the first place. This idea of no wrongdoing is what justifies his self-destructive habit. He believes that he isn’t that far gone because of the line “So, I bookmark my DSM 'cause I need to remember my place” The DSM is a medical handbook used as guidelines to diagnose mental disorders. So, the character uses the book to prove he isn’t that far gone because he doesn’t have all the symptoms of the mental disorder, he believes he might have. Since the book is backed up by decades of research, he knows that the book must be correct. However, since the book is only a guideline it is still possible for him to have the disorder, he believes he may or may not have it. I think the disorder he is possibly looking at is addiction and since he can barely remember events where it could prove certain symptoms, he assumes he doesn’t have that bad of an addiction where it requires medical