Russia, 1904
Today I made the decision to go to war against Japan. I knew that the Japanese were offended with my country because they were interested in Korea too. I did not want to go to war with Japan but I thought that if we had a successful war against Japan we could kill two birds with one stone. My ministers made me aware of the famines and industrial slumps my children were suffering. I haven’t the time to worry about this because I can see Mother Russia is beginning to fall from my grasp. The opportunity in a successful war will bring prosperity amongst my children and friends, to unite the nation in patriotism and still labour unrest. I would gain great popularity from this and my ministers persuaded me by convincing me that Japan would never go to war against the great empire of Russia. I believed them. Japanese are monkeys and are no military match for civilized Russia.
The monkeys offered me control over certain parts of northern Manchuria, but only in recognition of Japans control in the south of Manchuria. Do they think I will surrender that easily? The fools I had already made up my mind days ago. War was the only option I had to regain the likes of my people. February 8, 1904, reports of the Japanese surprise attack at Port Arthur today infuriate me. My blood runs cold; they have begun something they wish they had never started. How naive must these men be to torpedo one of my ships? Do they know who they are dealing with? Let the wrath of Mother Russia regain solitude by the defeat of the puny Japanese.
Today January 2, 1905, we have been at war with Japan for almost a year. My troops are suffering with tremendous loss. I have little words for the disaster this has turned out to be, humiliating me, my whole country is in turmoil. I sadly underestimated the true potential of the Japanese military. Port Arthur has been surrendered to the Japanese. I know my children will be anguished over this news and this had brought great stress to me. My children miss the bigger picture and are selfish wanting more than they deserve. This has created much distress among my people and children resulting in a worse position for Russia then we were before the war. I am lost and the fear of not reaching my father’s example of Tsar is daunting on me. I love my family but I have become angry at times and this intimidates me. I feel like this trait shows weakness in a man.
If things could possibly go worse for me today is the day. How will I overcome such tragedy? Is God so ashamed of me he brings great misfortune to me? I suffer with the news as I know this will lead my people and children into further upheaval. I feel isolated from my people, not knowing what to do to bring back prosperity. With the events of January 9, 1905, I have obtained the dreadful name of Bloody Tsar Nicholas or Nicholas the Bloody a constant reminder of my failure I am to my people. I didn’t order for the 200 people marching with Father Gapon to be shot down. I was infuriated with this decision. I demanded to know whom was responsible for this mess. The petition was for an end to forced overtime, fairer wages, and eight-hour working day, universal suffrage and an end to war with Japan. I didn’t care much for the wants of these people I am the Tsar after all, I have many other worries preoccupying me. My darling boy is suffering from a hideous disease called Haemophilia. This is constantly worrying me my precious boy, the future ruler of my kingdom savaged by