Our homes are an expression of how we want the world to see us. Melinda’s identity crisis started even before the rape occurred. Before all of the high school drama, Melinda and her friends redecorated all of their rooms when they were younger, and Melinda describes hers as “a postcard of who I was in fifth grade” (Anderson 15). Melinda makes the statement that hers is “stuck in the middle” (Anderson 15) echoing her current position. She’s not moving forward, and not backward, just like her room, and she’s stuck in an endless spiral of the shell of her old self. The only thing left from her younger years are some toy rabbits, which Melinda constantly refers to herself as. She’s holding on to who she used to be, the rabbit, instead of embracing who she is now. Melinda is very much like the main character in the beginning of the reading “Betrayed by the Angel” (Davis 571). The little girl takes the bullying, and believes it to be normal. In no point during the story, did she mention any feelings that her depression shouldn’t be happening to her. She believes she deserves some of the cruelty she has received, and wants to keep her mouth shut, lest she get the insults worse by opening it. She believes she is a rabbit, for the pleasure of the predators to hunt. She is in denial about the rape and has spoken to no one about it; just like the despised rose wallpaper she wants to take down on page …show more content…
It is described as having two different personalities. When Melinda flips the cushion to the messy side, this is symbolic of her being alone with her ‘messy’ thoughts and letting her true self show. Her father comes in, later in the scene, and Melinda quickly flips the cushion back to its pristine white side before disappearing. The clean white side represents the image she wants to convey, and how she desperately wants to be. Pure. Unclouded by her thoughts and to ‘normal’ high schooler. The readings of “The Cult of Virginity” touch on the topic of how a woman’s virginity determines her morality. The author, Jessica Valenti, states “You can be vapid, stupid, and unethical, but so long as you’ve never had sex, you’re a “good” girl” (Valenti 336). Melinda’s self-esteem wasn’t the best to begin with, but the rape shattered all she had, and with that pressure pressed upon her by society of being ‘good’, that makes her not to tell anyone about it even more. Melinda’s bottled up feelings are what is to blame for her depression, because they have no room to breathe, and that is no fault other than